Some will win, some will lose

What the fuck is it with Simon Cowell?

Why does that smug cunt insist on ruining everything that is good and right about pop music?

It started with Unchained Melody.

It continued with The Long And Winding Road, Cowell's hairless little boys Will 'n' Gareth incredibly concocting a version with less depth than that created by Phil Spector.

Last year his particular brand of evil appeared to reach its apotheosis with Hallelujah.

Now he's found a way of taking it a stage further still.

Now he's taking a very public shit on Don't Stop Believin'.

Don't Stop Believin', for fucksake.

It's official: nothing is sacred.

Motherfucking motherfucker.

Galileo was imprisoned for less.

If I ever get my hands on a Members Only jacket that fits me, Cowell, you gonna be swimmin' wit da fishes...

About

The Minister is a middle-aged, middle-class, extra-large male living in the ‘Northern Home Counties’/East of England. When he has no option or excuse to do otherwise the Minister practices the dark art of the law.

The Minister prefers to write in black ink (utilising blue ink only when in a bad mood) and thinks very poorly of anyone who uses Arial font.

For the avoidance of doubt, the Minister is neither ordained nor a politician. Allegations to the contrary will be referred to the Ministry for Justice.